Lately I have been asked what I do personally when things get tough- when I doubt myself, fear sets in and I become anxiety ridden.
That alone is a whopper of a question and I naturally took a deep breath, but I knew exactly how to answer it.
I essentially do five main things.
1. I release the heavy emotions. Emotions sit in your body until you release them. As we age, we tend to keep things bottled up more, which is the opposite of what we should be doing. You become a swap if you never address the heaviness. Remember that article? For me, exercising helps to release the negative or stale emotions that are sitting in my body. I typically need to do something that gets my heart rate up and leaves me gasping for air- like sprints, kickboxing (on a bag) or a crossfit style workout. This allows me to release anger, fear, pain, etc in a physical way and I start to feel so much better.
2. I talk it out. Talk therapy is so good for the soul. I do not go to a therapist (however, I am ALL for them), but I do have a couple people in my life that I feel extremely comfortable sharing my thoughts with in a very raw way. I make sure that I do not just have one person as that becomes exhausting for that one person, but I choose who I feel will best create a safe place for me to unload in that moment (I first ask them if they are available for me as well). Just by talking I find that I answer my own questions, getting someone else's feedback can be so helpful (as they are not in that dire need of emotional stability), and it becomes very healing- especially if I shed tears.
3. I meditate and sage myself. I do not meditate to gain answers when going through a tough time, but I meditate to clear my mind. I already released the emotions through exercise and talking so then I need to sit with an open mind and allow myself to feel that space that I created for new and more pure thoughts to start wandering in. It feels extremely clearing and freeing. I also sage myself because I am a huge believer in energy... and your thoughts are energy. So if I am clearing myself of negative thoughts, why wouldn't I cleanse my energy too?
4. I fill myself up. I listen and read personal development books and podcasts daily. This helps inspire me to think more positively, spin the narrative in my mind, and find the next best thing in my thoughts, emotions or life so I can take action.
Now listen... this took me a long time to get to this point. I used to cry and cry and cry and dwell and dwell and dwell. Or eat a whole cake or chew all my finger nails off or make my best friend want to bang her head into the wall. But through becoming more self aware and doing the work, I have come to a better understanding of how I heal and work through negative emotions. Some situations are better than others, but I am and will always be a work in progress.
What do you do when you are down?